According to the surgeon general, parental stress is an “urgent public health issue.” This new advisory, “Parents Under Pressure,” prompted over-the-top headlines such as “Surgeon General’s warning: Parenting may be hazardous to your health.” What should Christians make of this?
Well, first we must recognize that the headlines are not really an accurate description of the advisory—it’s not parenting, per se, that is a “public health issue.” Rather, it’s the stress many parents are reporting that the surgeon general’s office is concerned about. According to the study,
One-third of parents with children under 18 rate their stress level as 8 or higher on a 10-point scale, according to psychological association data. Two-fifths of parents report being “so stressed they feel numb.” Three-fifths say stress makes it hard to focus. Two-thirds are consumed by money woes.
In each case, parents report markedly higher rates of stress than nonparents.
And apparently, the common stressors include things like:
- Rising childcare prices
- Other financial concerns
- Increased demands on time
- Loneliness
- And concerns about technology
Many of the items on that list are concerning to all Americans—parents just feel it more because they have more people dependent on them! So why is the media portraying this study in such a “clickbait” kind of way? Well, it’s really not very shocking to see headlines denigrating parenting—choosing to be “childfree” is increasingly seen as the virtuous, unselfish choice. Sadly, reports such as these are likely to increase the negative associations around parenting—something God declares is good and one of the reasons for marriage (yes, contrary to what our culture believes, children are a blessing!).
There’s a massive attack on the family in our culture. The devil knows the family is the backbone of the culture and the educational unit God uses to transfer spiritual legacy from one generation to the next and impact the world for God.
Of course, the reasons that parents are so stressed are complex (I think nearly everyone is more stressed in the current economy than even just a few years ago, for example), but this report reminded me of the importance of the church in the lives of families. Interestingly, studies have found that people who attend church show much lower levels of stress than those who don’t.
Perhaps families are more stressed because so many of them aren’t plugged into a local church (only about 30% of all US adults attend some form of religious services regularly) and therefore don’t have the community, support, and partnership that the family of God has offered generations. Older women aren’t teaching the younger women how to “love their husbands and children” (Titus 2:4), and older men aren’t encouraging and supporting fathers in their job of spiritually leading their homes.
When we see reports like this, it should be a reminder that parents need the support of the church—we all need the community of believers.
Parenting isn’t hazardous to your health. Children are a wonderful blessing from the Lord (and some studies have found parenting helps you live longer!). Don’t allow fear-mongering headlines to influence your view of children or child-rearing. Yes, it’s a difficult job, but it’s a job with eternal significance and blessing.
And remember, the ultimate solution to every issue is God’s Word and the gospel.
